Episode #382: Leaders Need To Empty Their Cup

Tokusan the scholar visited Ryutan the Zen Master to learn about Zen. Tokusan was a very smart fellow and very confident in his knowledge and experience. He was good at impressing others with his capabilities and many people looked to him for guidance and advice. After about ten minutes of conversation, Ryutan invited Tokusan to enjoy some green tea. As the Zen master poured the hot tea into the cup, the tea began to flood over the brim, but Ryutan kept pouring the tea. Tokusan became agitated and said to stop pouring, because the cup was already full. Ryutan then told Tokusan that he couldn't understand Zen until he emptied his own mental cup, to allow new ideas to enter.

This is a famous zen story in Japan and we leaders are Tokusan. We can be convinced of our ideas and become stubborn and inflexible about departing from them. We have risen through the ranks based on our abilities, experience and results. We had to work things out for ourselves and our decisions were correct. Over time we came to believe in ourselves and our decisions and we would plough ahead regardless of what others might have thought. We have always had to overcome resistance. We are now in the leader danger zone.

There is tricky line between knowing what you are doing and actually being correct. We became the boss because our previous ideas were proved correct and superior to what others were advocating. We have seen off the idiots, doubters, naysayers, critics and rivals. We have climbed the greasy pole and they haven’t. Everyone should listen to us and believe what we say, because we are right and they are wrong. Case closed.

This is the classic hero journey favoured by the independent, tough, driven, Type A, alpha mammals. For a very long time this worked just fine. Business however has grown more enmeshed with technology changes. More complex organisations have arisen and operate at hyper speed. Also, a different animal has been entering our companies, coming in straight out of college. Are we actually able to deal with these unparalleled changes?

Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution put more importance of adaptability than strength or brains. Are we maintaining our full cup and therefore not well placed to adapt? Are we trying to do it all by ourselves? Many bosses are unable to hire smart people, because they cost too much, relative to the size of the cash flow in the company. Others won’t hire smart people, because they are scared of becoming a victim of future corporate internecine struggles, where they can be replaced with someone younger and cheaper. How exactly can we work through others?

Covid-19 has disrupted business globally and the future is uncertain. How do leaders know what to do going forward? How do you know if your strategy is the correct one or not? Strong willed leaders see asking others for advice as a sign of timidity and weakness. They have attached their personal inner resilience to always knowing the correct answer, to being right, to being smarter and more savvy than everyone else.

Complexity today exceeds the capability of one person leading the team to have all the answers. A superman or superwoman is no longer required. What happens though if you, as the leader, have low self awareness and can’t see that you need to empty your cup? Exactly how do you empty your cup? What should go inside the now empty cup? Lack of self awareness is one of the biggest hurdles to overcome. Once that is accomplished then the emptying and refilling of the cup can start to happen.

We have to face ourselves and ask why do we think we are able to keep operating as we have always done, when the current situation is more difficult. There are no indications we are ever going back to how things used to be? Emptying the cup requires humility, often in short supply with powerful leaders. Running faster, pushing aside and overtaking the other lemmings to ultimately be sprinting off the cliff, is of no help.

This is the moment to stop and consider your own cup. Is it full of your baloney, that you have convinced yourself is correct? Have you surrounded yourself with “yes men” or the meek and compliant? Have you bullied everyone into submission? Are there ways to tap into more ideas and solutions than you can possibly produce by yourself? Are there people closer to the action on a daily basis, who will have greater and better insights than you can possibly have. Your frontline experience is way out of date by now, as you have arisen through the ranks over these many years.

This is scary. Your self belief is what has driven you thus far and questioning it unravels a lot of your personal construct about your right to lead others. That is the old model of leadership, so let it go. The used by date has expired on that one. Empty your cup and your ego and find ways of learning more from others, including those who work for you and may even be quite junior. Tokusan thought he knew everything until Ryutan started pouring that tea. I am pouring your tea for you right now and challenging whether your cup is going to stay full or will you make the effort to empty it?