Episode #492: Why Is Coaching So Hard?

Bosses coaching employees is such a critical task, yet so few leaders get any training on how to be effective in this role. In Japan, the OJT On The Job Training is supposed to provide the guidance needed. That probably worked back in the 1960s when Japan was doubling the size of the GNP. Today though it is a poor cousin to what it used to be. Back then, the bosses didn’t ever touch a keyboard. They weren’t carrying around the internet armed with supreme connectivity in their hand like today. The time poor pressure we feel today was probably evident then too, but I think the speed of business has accelerated to an extent which makes comparisons between then and now meaningless.

Today’s leaders are doing their own email, answering their own mobile phones and constantly migrating from one meeting room to another. The one-on-one time needed for coaching has sailed out the window and been replaced with a thin version of OJT. Time management is a challenge for everyone, including bosses. I am always astonished when we are teaching leadership classes, to find out the vast majority of people in the class do not have a prioritised list of things to get done every day. If a leader is not prioritising their day then they are living the prioritised day created by someone else.

To coach subordinates the first thing you need is time. If you don’t have that most basic ingredient, then nothing will happen in any sustained, meaningful way. Let’s assume the boss has at least managed to make time for their staff. What else do they need? Sports coaches once upon a time would coach everyone in the same way. Hollywood has captured that old narrative with the scenes of locker room oratory from the coach whipping the team up into a frenzy before they go out for the game. Nobody is doing that anymore for a good reason – it is isn’t niche enough to cater for each individual.

Sports coaches have worked out that they need to know the personality type of their star. They understand how their athletes prefer to be communicated with and then match to that style. Shouting incendiary phrases at introverts won’t get very far. In the same way whispering conspiratorilly in dulcet tones won’t work with extroverts who want to feed off the energy of others. This applies to the motivations of each staff member as well.

Of course, the firm will have their vision, mission and values as guiding lights for the staff. The usual problem with that, in my experience, is no one can remember much of it. Vision – usually nothing. Mission – the same. Of the five or so values, the team get around two or three. What that means is there has been poor communication about the supposed glue of the organisation. Just for fun, do a quick survey of your team and see how many remember any of this stuff and don’t forget to include yourself too!!

The boss needs to know what are the personal vision, mission and values of their staff. What do they want to do? Also have they changed it since you last checked, because people’s lives change. If you get married or have children or lose a parent, then a lot of aspirations and goals get adjusted. The boss needs to knew what the new plan is. Now in my youth it would have been unthinkable for the boss to get that cozy with my aspirations. Today, it is different. Staff want to know you are in their corner, helping them achieve their goals. Therefore we need to have these types of intimate, confidential conversations today, to make sure we are in lock step with our team.

The boss also has to be expert in the main field of endeavour. If you are running a sales organisation and you are outed as someone who can’t sell yourself, then all credibility and hope is lost right there. If you are the head of marketing and you don’t know much about the latest aspects of marketing, there won’t be much followship going on. You get the idea. The basic requirement is that you are competent in your field. As the boss, we don’t necessarily have to get down in the mud and the blood of the machine, but we have to demonstrate we know how things are supposed to work around here.

That is the minimum to be taken seriously when coaching others. If you are obviously out of date or ignorant of the latest and greatest, then no one will take any direction from you. You might be thinking, “duh”, that’s obvious. Yes it is, but what have you been doing to keep yourself up to date? What personal development have you been undertaking to be abreast of the new directions being forged in your sector of the industry?

So the very basics for coaching are boss time, subtle yet persuasive communication skills, deep knowledge of the individuals in the team and what is important to them plus ample personal expertise. How do you stack up?