Episode #156: Charismatic Leadership

Are you a perpetual student? I am always keen to learn and improve in my business, so I recently participated in a webinar on the subject of charisma in leadership. The set up for the webinar was impressive – the web landing page, the registration process, the videos, the automated follow–up emails. It was a Master Class in marketing and this part was worth it alone. The webinar itself was very good and the speaker was excellent. While listening, I was reflecting on charismatic leaders I have known and compared them to what I was hearing in the webinar.

There is an abundance of definitions on charismatic leadership. The definition proffered during the on-line session was uncontroversial and acceptable: emotional and intellectual engagement, inspiration to go the extra mile – all quite reasonable elements. Somehow though, they left me feeling vaguely unfulfilled.

Reflecting on charismatic leaders, what was it about them that made them so attractive? Of course they were highly skilled, experienced and professional. Yet their technical knowledge wasn’t the distinguishing feature, because hosts of uncharismatic leaders are equally skilled. Great communicators, they capture the key points, are concise, insightful, engaging. No shortage of would-be charismatic leaders with this resume, but still no cigar. Optimistic, positive, high energy, fast paced, dynamic – yes all good points, but there was still something missing.

The webinar speaker made the point that anyone can learn to be a highly engaging leader. It is not a “born with” attribute, more a learnt outcome that reflects itself in how we behave with others. But what elevates a charismatic leader above an engaging leader? Behaviour, communication, kokorogamae (心構え) or true intention all play a part. True intention pertains to the WHY we are wanting to lead. Is it all about us or is it about our team?

I think the missing piece of the puzzle was the way charismatic leaders make us feel when we are with them. I have heard that in his prime Bill Clinton would speak with you and make you feel like you were the only person in the room, despite being bustled by the massive crowd. When you think about it, there is a lot happening in that situation, for us to sense that. Our feeling of importance, regard, value, trusting almost whispered intimacy is so attractive.

Well, if it is behavior driven and not God given, then what do leaders need to do to become more charismatic. Do we have to be over 185cms in height? I notice that a lot of famous leaders are tall, so there is bound to be some physical advantage associated with the presence that size brings with it. As kids we look up at our authority figures – parents, teachers, coaches, so there may be deep psychological roots in giving regard to those we have to crane our necks toward. There is probably some caveman DNA regard for physical power in there too. I have stopped growing, so there is no possibility for me to bridge that gap. Maybe we can’t be tall or a Bill Clinton, but we can be a better version of ourselves and a more effective leader of our team.

What are some relevant behaviours we can adopt to make us more charismatic?

Begin with praise and honest appreciation. This must be genuine and linked to actual behavior, not vagaries or flattery. There isn’t a lot of praise and appreciation floating around in businesses every day, because a lot of leaders are Driver personality styles, who prioritise task completion over building people (e.g. you will all die, but we will take Hill 103).

We can be different – we can look for the good, the strengths in our people and play to those rather than lurking around the cubicles with our super fault-finder, nuclear harpoon at the ready. If we find fault, call attention to it indirectly. We don’t lift people up by making them feel small. We should also use encouragement and make the fault seem easy to correct. Our weak side always needs bolstering, so charismatic leaders lead us to hope. Let them save face, don’t create a barrier by lambasting them. Showing whose the boss only makes one person feel good. Everyone else observes like a hawk and anticipates what will happen when it is their turn. No hearts and minds will be won this way. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to. This means seeing people at their best and treating them that way rather than the opposite. Seeing them as winners, when they don’t see themselves that way just yet.

We can ask questions, instead of giving direct orders. Socrates was on to the power of this approach centuries ago, but the typical boss today is still an order dispensing android. When we tell, we own the task - when we ask, our people take ownership. We all own the world we help to create, so let’s be the boss who seeks help creating our world. Make them feel happy about doing the thing you suggest. Self-discovery is powerful, convincing, energizing and credible. The leaders job is to create the environment where self-discovery becomes the daily norm.

Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. We ask people to step out of their Comfort Zone to try new things. There is a strong fear of failure associated with any new, unfamiliar initiative. We build confidence through mini steps, gradually setting larger stretch tasks, recognising improvement on the way through, as well as at the end. Success, however small, builds confidence to take on more and we are right there with them to reassure that they can do it. We talk about our own failings first, to give them the freedom to fail, to remove the albatross of “perfection” from the equation. It is hard to follow ”perfect leaders”, because we can’t identify with them. In the leader’s vulnerability is authenticity, but this requires heart, guts and bravery.

Is any of this easy – no!

If our behavior is the driver, then we need to persistently and permanently change our approach. To do that we need some guideposts and these principles of better human relations are well road tested and work. Maybe achieving charismatic leadership isn’t that important, but better leadership certainly is. It is also attainable, now. We need to adopt these principles, apply them everyday, every occasion and gradually make them our default habits. It won’t happen in a week but it will happen – we just need to clarify our true intentions and make a start.

Action Steps

Begin with praise and honest appreciation
Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly
Use encouragement and make the fault seem easy to correct
Let the other person save face
Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to
Ask questions, instead of giving direct orders
Make the other person feel happy about doing the thing you suggest
Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement
Talk about our own mistakes before criticizing the other person
Start with clear and correct kokorogamae - true intentions